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Friday, November 03, 2006:
The joys of flirting?
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flirt
n 1: a seductive woman who uses her sex appeal to exploit men [syn: coquette, vamp, vamper, minx, tease, prickteaser] 2: playful behavior intended to arouse sexual interest [syn: flirting, flirtation, coquetry, dalliance, toying] v 1: talk or behave amorously, without serious intentions; "The guys always try to chat up the new secretaries"; "My husband never flirts with other women" [syn: chat up, dally, butterfly, coquet, coquette, romance, philander, mash] 2: behave carelessly or indifferently; "Play about with a young girl's affection" [syn: dally, toy, play]
What do you consider flirting: banter between members of the opposite sex? Winks and touching? Suggestive conversation? All of the above?
I would choose #2 and #3, but not #1, which is more how I am with guys. I like to tease and joke around with the guys, definitely. Some people consider any teasing between a man and a woman to be an exercise in flirting, and I don't agree.
I'm not a flirt. I'm really, really not. Not by this definition anyway. I don't consider my behavior to be flirtatious, at least not by these standards. Yet recently I've been told that I am, and it kinda bothers me. I can't explain it, because I don't really have anything against flirting, but I reserve flirting for private use with someone I am interested in, not for public conversations at work.
Part of it is because I work in a professional environment with a lot of people and it's a very visible position within the company, so I am very much aware how I come across to the public. Sometimes it can be a really stressful job, and a great way to relieve the stress is to joke with the people that come into the office, 99% of whom I see almost everyday or at least once a week. We have everyone from mechanics to computer geeks to cleaning people to vice presidents of the company coming into my office, so it's a wide array of people all day long. It's easier to tease the guys, though I have no problem giving anyone a hard time just to get them to laugh and forget about the crazy stuff for awhile, and to make my job easier, too. There's nothing like fun and comaradie to bring people together and avoid any negative confrontations.
And the other thing is, I don't want to give anyone the wrong impression, that I am interested in them when I am not. I do know some women who flirt with guys so that they will do stuff for them, but I don't work that way. If someone helps me out, I'll help them out, and not take advantage, and certainly not lead the guy on. [One thing that drives me crazy is a woman who gets all dependent and all "I'm the poor, helpless woman who can't lift this piece of paper, please help me"].
Maybe I'm overreacting and being waaaay too sensitive about the whole thing, so I'm curious to know what you think:
What is your definition of flirting?
How do you feel about it?
Does it bother you or are you okay with it?
Are you a flirt?
And how do you feel about other women who flirt, especially with your man?


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This is so not me!

2 Comments

  1. I am in no way a flirt. I don't know the first thing about being a flirt. It just isnt my nature.


  2. I feel the same way Kelley. I don't think of myself that way at all. It just doesn't fit with my personality. I like to joke around and have fun, but I'm not about batting my eyelashes or whatever LOL.

    And it drives me crazy to see women be all flirty and helpless just to get some guy to do something for them - I am so the opposite. I'd rather be able to do it myself than have to ask for help. That's just me *g*


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